Preparations
Before you dive in and start tackling the subject, it's important to be prepared. There are a few things you will need if you're serious about a-learnin':
- A real dictionary
- Something to write with, and something to write on
- A translator site
- An electronic dictionary
- Japanese fonts
- A Japanese word processor
- Someone to talk to
- Nerves of steel
- Buns of steel
- Buns of cheese
I could sit here for weeks typing up boring vocab lists, and there'd still be words missing. Fortunately, there are fantastic books entirely devoted to such lists. Get yourself a Japanese-English dictionary - even a little pocket one will do - and keep it at hand. Consult it often. Kanji dictionaries are harder to come across, but don't panic if you can't find one.
Yes, I mean pen and paper. Looking at symbols will only get you so far; actually writing them will provide experience and speed up the learning process. It's a good idea to use squared paper, as it helps you stay "inside the lines."
Babelfish is probably the most famous, but any will do. While you shouldn't rely on them to actually translate, they do a good job of giving you the "gist" of a whole page without you having to look up hundreds of words.
While you're at the computer, you might as well find a dictionary program too. It's sometimes quicker than the dead tree version, particularly when you can copy-and-paste from websites, and they may have extra nice features for kanji lookups or teaching lists and such. Make sure you can use it offline, and do not use interpretive translators such as the Babelfish.
The rest of the guide will use Japanese text, and not images. Japanese web pages are naturally a wonderful source of experience. Therefore, it's pretty vital that yor browser is able to display the language. If this example page is full of copyright symbols and random letters, make sure your browser's encoding (usually under the view menu) is set to Automatic or Shift-JIS. If that doesn't work, you may need extra Japanese fonts. Internet Explorer users will be prompted to download these fonts automatically, and other Windows users can download Japanese language support from Windows Update. Or, just search for appropriate CJK (Chinese, Japanese, Korean) or Unicode fonts.
This is optional, but useful if you intend to actually type anything. They're actually very handy even if you aren't going to write anything, as they usually come with built-in dictionaries and other such entertainments. JWPce is a particular favourite of mine, as it's quick and simple and, more importantly, free. Microsoft's Global IME lets you enter Japanese in all sorts of programs, but apparently it now only comes with the Office suite. Another alternative is popular shareware NJStar. Shop around and find one you like.
When working on pronunciation, or just trying to memorise things, you'll probably need to speak out loud. The poor victim doesn't need to know any Japanese, and may even be your cat if you so wish. It's just important to vocalise. Which brings us to:
Speaking in a foreign tongue, especially to those who know the mistakes you're making, is an intimidating event. If it helps, try to imagine them naked. If they're really willing, get them to strip.
It's important to look good when you're showing off your linguistic skills, as it will demonstrate that you're both intelligent and fit, and are therefore sex on legs. It's a real chick magnet. So I hear.
A good source of food, which helps keep your energy levels up and stops you from dying. Particularly good with some sort of pickle.
Now, you should be all set. Go forth and translate!
